Different countries celebrate Eid differently. In Singapore, aside from giving out red/green packets filled with money (gift/zakat/donations from our yearly abundance) , we wear new clothes (or recycled ones) and we visit relatives , friends and those we loved and seek forgiveness for the past from each other. This is the beauty i like in this community.
This coming Eid some of us are anticipating with much excitement to meet families and friends, some of us meanwhile hated the idea and desire to escape.
And instead of wearing new or beautiful clothes, we decided to don masks alongside fake identities just to get through it all.
Meeting family can be a tumultuous event. Some of us have dysfunctional families that does not seem to be easier with age.
I used to cloak myself with adopted beliefs like -all humans are good no matter what. See the good, ignore the bad.
This works fine in the positive fantasy world but when some peeps just blatantly hurt you upfront (dont even bother hiding it) with betrayal after betrayal, for sure one day, no matter how nice we are, we will get sick of being hurt and start to warrior up and say-Enough is enough. I had enough. U r no longer welcome in my life.
These instances may seem to break you but actually they are for us to learn/unlearn and grow and be stronger.
I used to have lousy boundaries in my youths. Because i can feel peeps’ pain and their past events, i over empathize. My self-esteem and worthiness is so poor that whoever latches themselves to me, i felt grateful and withstand whatever they threw at me. I didnt know i had the power of choice.
Even if i was betrayed in the face, i will get up and smile and act as if nothing happened. I refused to confront anyone who did me wrong often justifying myself as a reason for such predicament. Or berate myself for not being patient enough to withstand all these, life trials.
It took me decades before a realization hit me that they were wrong for me from the beginning.
Such toxic friends and families may hurt not only you but your closed ones.
Some are just clueless how toxic they can be. Some suck peeps dry (energy n life force too thus these events can b exhausting for some) and because they are nice, they allow their loved ones to continuously do so. Because they are scared that if they speak up or stop them, they will leave.
(See the blessing ?They leave to make space for quality peeps to enter your life.)
So when you have done your best, speak up for yourself, protect and defend, surrender fully to the Almighty.
Some peeps are so determined to suck u dry or hurt u or latch themselves to u, that they snake and worm their way into your life through your loved ones (weakest link)… because in every success, there is envy and jealousy. And most peeps think in a world of lack. (If we only knew that to magnetise the same for ourselves is to bless them.)
And if we don’t stand up for ourselves , then who will?
So build yourself up. And have a healthy belief about yourself and create healthy boundaries for all relationships.
Stand up. Speak up. Protect and defend yourself from bullies, hypocrites, frenemies and loved ones cloaked with daggers to hurt you. Its our right.
Its never right to let others bully you even if they belong to the same blood line as you or related to you in names.
Because dislike can turn to hate and eventually resentment. And 1 tiny bit of it, daily … can wound us and may also lead to bitterness and death. It kills us slowly.
I have learnt from successful mentors of the world….the 5 peeps we let into our lives play a crucial part in our lives. They can help to lead you to world of success or failure.
Happy, or sad, fear or love, its all boil down to our choices.
Energy wise, all of us are equipped with amazing intuition. Whether we use it or not, its up to us. And we can take action, shield and ask the Creator to protect us by prayers and supplication.
Take some responsibility. Our life =our choices. Current state = results of past choices. Pay heed, be aware, improvise n resolute to do better.
If we chicken out on ourselves, we lead our lives hiding in cowardice. Also if we never stand up, those who bullied us never know how they have hurt and traumatized us and we may take away their opportunity to change.
As warriors, we are not afraid to do what is hard. Its in our creed.
Also, let’s do our best not to gossip especially in family gatherings ,even if our best intentions are to update.
I was taught that in Islam, gossip = akin to eating your bro or sis flesh. Metamorphically, literally or even sinfully…it don’t matter. It has a bad vibe. Prevent it. Or avoid being in such congregation of gossips.
And words of such malices are energetic arrows shot to the peeps we gossip about (called penyakit ain in malay-it is present in all cultures. Solution?don’t boast your success to mass but share only to selected few n recite 3Qul /ayat kursi/any Quranic verses with intentions of protection is enough to fight these energetic arrows insyallah. I personally had such amongst my closed ones and mass when i was a popular blogger. In Islam, I was also taught to cleanse myself from the water/wudhu taken by the perp if u knew who it was n able to confront them.)
Some may get wounded (effects-Can faint , get fever and more) …and if not strong enough may inflict imbalances that can cause illness. Even our own toxic self thoughts and talks can hurt us).
And in my tribe of spiritual energy healing world, the energy emits from such actions is truly toxic for both perp and victim. So be aware of words coming out of your mouth.
Enjoy the adventure of life, dear Warriors. Remember everything happens for a reason, a blessing and miracles.