Cancer and resentment…

When Eid arrived, in Singapore, we visited our loved ones and practice forgiveness with one another. We meet, eat and utter forgiveness for the years together.

Sometimes, due to travels, I didn’t get to participate. And recently, many have passed without my knowledge. Most issues are cancer in Singapore.

As mentioned, I seldom faced Clients with major imbalances that resulted in physical ailments because most of my clients are warriors who are fully aware of their healthy/unhealthy states of bodies, hearts, minds and hearts.

My niche is heart and spirit and it’s emotional turbulence and challenges. But there were a few with physical ailments which are symptoms to me like cancer, MS and more. Alhamdulillah they are all on recovery paths.

I wondered aloud why many I knew faced cancer. Singaporeans are one of the nicest peeps I’ve known. And we were brought up with the good ethics of mixed Chinese, Malays, Indians and more. Some of us love to work to contribute to society that even after retirement age, we sought to volunteer with our time and energy.

One of our political leaders mentioned that if we start to retire and do nothing, we start to die. There is some truth to that. But again, adopt others’ beliefs wisely.

And so I sought one of my my first teacher’s list of causes of such imbalances. According to Louise Hay, cancer causes may be from: “Deep hurt. Longstanding resentment. Deep secret or grief eating away at the self. Carrying hatred.”

And in my observation, those who have cancer are often one of the most big hearted groups of peeps. They love so much that they are willing to give beyond empty for their loved ones. Some even live for them (they wake up everyday worrying about their loved ones not able to function well without them in life).

If we look at Hay’s idea of its causes. Resentment, hatred are truly toxic in our bodies. To keep them lingering in our system even for a few minutes can make us unwell. Let alone, years.

I personally have hated certain individuals growing up and it felt like I was carrying them around wherever I go. Until I learn the emotion and body code from Dr. Bradley Nelson, a retired chiropractor in USA.

From him, I’ve learnt about muscle testing,.. Trapped emotions, heart walls, “body talk”, meridians – streams of energies, Asians and western healing techniques and more. I began to be more aware of the body then I was learning biology in school exams.

But truly looking back, my first healing classes involved the Quran. It was an accidental discovery. I volunteered in a Hifz and Quranic school in Singapore. And I was invited many times to learn healing which I eventually went and end up managing. I was reluctant because I was afraid. The first healing sessions I witnessed was entity possessions, witch craft healing and conversations with the unseen entities – Jinn.

I didn’t seek these lessons. I was fearful. It was something new to me. I was only in my late teens, just discovering adulthood.

But they were crucial to me and my future travels (back then) because these entities are everywhere. And some cultures worship them and allow them to manipulate or reside in their bodies in hope of higher intelligence and wisdom. (when travel, I mingle with myriad faiths, race and cultures to learn n unlearn).

Alhamdulillah, though reluctant, my teachers were professionals who have helped hundreds and thousands in mass around the world thus I learnt lots. And so when I mingle with myriad nationalities and their beliefs, I was able to discern what was mine and understood in-depth on what they were sharing.

Also wherever I go, hotels, hostels and Airbnb often have entities living in them because there can be unknown murders or evil ongoings or past misdeeds of mankind that may leave energy residues and also long period of vacancy can also attract entities to live in them.

Quran healing helped a lone wanderer like me (that’s why, I don’t like ghost movies. I felt I’ve seen too much and most what was portrayed are not truths).

Anyway from my years of experiences as the energy healing professional and coach….to get our own bodies and cells to work against us is betrayal. Meaning, it’s not easy to make our bodies work against us because it was created to heal us and more. Unless, we have continuously betrayed them that they eventually turn against us as a form of self-protection, then my take is to work on these “betrayals”.

Most of my clients spill their truths when they faced me. They cannot lie cause I can detect it. Why lie and make it harder for us both to help one another? Especially when my work is to help you peel layers of our onion skins?

Recently I wanted to retire from this energy healing profession. I felt that I cannot see anymore of others’ suffering and pain. As an empath, my everyday is often an immersion. So whatever my Clients and surroundings shared loudly or invisibly, it’s a total immersion for me. And I’ve been seeking the Almighty in recent pilgrimages thru Solat istikharah and supplications wondering if I need to stop my healing work (I’m a happy go lucky being n years of healing has tored open my fantasy like idea of what humans are capable of and the negative extent we did or willing to do to ourselves and each other just because..)

And it was revealed to me that I shouldn’t retire. Because it’s not easy for peeps to find someone with my gifts (everyone has the gifts I have, be aware n sharpen them by using them) who are open to be their witness in their good and bad aspects of life.

Unlike priests where one confessed to get some kind of renewed life and redemption, a healer’s job is also to help shine some light to parts hidden, neglected and rejected.

My role is to further push your buttons, poke your vulnerability and confront your wounds till it bleeds out in the open and speaking about it to a person in a safe environment is just the beginning of the journey (don’t misunderstood that I’m belittling priests’ work, no I’m not. All works are crucial and should not be judged according to our limited perspectives).

And so as a healer (true healer is God, I’m just a tool)… I have to understand your pain and suffering and feel them while go beyond to understand what it’s truths and lesson brought. Not easy thus this is why many do not want to choose this role and it’s heavy responsibilities. And as much as I love being introvert, I cannot keep silent if truths are being revealed to me.

I felt growing up with many wounds helped me to be expanded (or u called – broken. Like glow sticks, we break them so it can emit neon light )…in many ways than one that I was able to relate to many strangers coming my way to share their life stories. Little did I know, I was helping them, and healing us both. Thru this accumulation thru out my life, nothing faze me. Anything is definitely possible.

So, my dear warriors…

In our paths of self healing journey… Hate, resentment, emotionally charged energies like grief left unhealed in our bodies can do more harm for us than we ever can imagined. Seek to solve them by forgiveness. It’s a gift to ourselves. What use of carrying all these while the perps live life happy and unaware? Why self destruct ourselves just because we refuse to let go due to our ego?

I personally knew forgiveness is not easy. It’s not about forgetting. It’s about holding onto some stuffs while exhibiting toxic energies towards these memories played over and over again like broken records.

I believe our Creator always leave us more than 1 solutions for every challenges and problems in our lives including dis-eases.

Regardless of what our limited perceptions we had about God and whoever created us, I know that He will answer whenever we ask. And He is all about unconditional love. He loves us more than we can ever imagined.

So start surrendering things we cannot heal, to Him. Ask Him for guidance in the wee hours of silence. And listen with all our hearts and might and be aware that He is constantly speaking to us…

Wake up. No matter what pain we carry thru out our lives, let’s start by believing that the Almighty has our backs and that we are never alone. And if that is impossible, then start with a tiny list of daily gratitude.

Start witnessing and expect miracles. And we InsyaAllah will magnetise more of the good things in life.

We are definitely worthy. Allah (I chose this name, u can use/replace whatever labels feels right to u) wants the best for us, always.

I hope you and your loved ones are blessed with the best things in life and hereafter. And may whatever solutions desired, be showcased to you clearly and guided to you with much love.

(I may not know you personally but I love you. Why? Being human is not easy and if u are here reading my blog then that means who are working hard to improve and heal yourself and I love that in you. There are no accidents in life only synchronicity. So keep up the good work, warriors!)

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