I don’t celebrate Xmas but I’ve wandered about many families during celebrations of various cultures around the world and noted the awkwardness of annual families’ gatherings…
The pretence, the anxiety, the lies, the judgements, the tiredness of seeking approval, the condescending, the feminists, the chauvinistic, the narcissists, the bullies, the loners, the introverts, and more.
The ugliness beautiful mess, of wounded peeps, ego, drama all into one, all doing their bestest to stay civil and peace and harmonious, while internally waging wars and many more can be tuned in by many sensitives.
My own gatherings itself is colorful.
For the sensitive beings like empaths (everyone is an empath to a certain degree)…
Holidays can be a stressful season. Thus these are tips on how you can glide along with your loves ones with cheerful vibes.
1. Meditate and send some love to each individual or collective groups you are going to meet. Easiest is to hug each of them and thank them with much love you can garner, in meditation and visualisation (if you cannot, just put aside all grievances, feelings and judgements and imagine you are doing charity work by being a hug bear). You can do it, a day or night before such gatherings.
2.Everything has energy. Every place, every season, time and peeps. So before visiting the location, imagine before hand that you "cleansed" the place, the everything - furniture and peeps. It's a ho'oponopono modern way by imagining, you have a scrub sponge full with bleach or chosen disinfectant and you are cleaning the energy of yours towards all these. As you scrub, you say in your heart or mind - I'm sorry, please forgive me, I love you, thank you. All 4 sentences or just 1 that you feel is right.
For Muslims, who do not wish to refer to any healing modality, just refer back to simple Islamic habit is enough- just zikir - astaghfirullah, or alhamdulillah etc).
3.Lastly, families matter a lot to the sensitives. And sometimes, we take things too personal. So this is best if we imagine everyone present, is in a TV show with their own scripts and flow. This way, we won't be entangled too much in our own ego and drama with theirs. And we won't intrude nor try to change anyone or anything. Just be the watcher/observer. (when TV show is frustrating, just laugh it off).
4.Too suffocating? Be aware of what's going on with yourself and the inner chatter. Ground yourself with washing hands, breathe deeply. Or go out in nature and see the awe-scenic views. If nothing, just look up, the sky is endless, so is any possibility and miracles that can happen for you.
5.Shielding may work for you by imagining layers of impermeable membrane protecting you from the outside world and only allow love to enter. For me, it won't work for my loved ones. Because I love them, I want to understand them. I want to hear and be present for them. I want to heal them and me whenever I can. I tried shielding, it won't work. My heart will automode open whenever (anyone in my family whom I have not met in ages) has a sappy story.
So when it's overwhelming, I say in my heart - whatever that is not mine, return to the Creator. And I imagine them passing through me and back home to the Almighty. (a note to empaths healer - we cannot save or rescue anyone if they don't want to. If we absorp their pain, and if they haven't learn the lessons connected, they will be given the same pain, struggles until they do, no matter how much we absorp them and help them. Even simply by listening, we can absorp them.
Sometimes we allow ourselves to listen the same old record over and over again and carry the same shit/baggage back home. And it was never our trash to throw out).
6.Often times, empaths, we think we are alone because we are unique. Regardless of what we each believe, trust that the Creator has our backs. The limitations we have of our Almighty/Higher power often limit our connection with Him. His love for us is beyond unconditional. No matter what we think of Him or even believe His existence, when we ask Him for help always believe that He will answer. If you think this is futile ask Him for signs to believe in the unseen. When we have this faith that someone greater has our backs, we won't feel so hopeless, have too much expectations or control over our lives and we can shine brighter as ourselves.
7.Straighten your spine. Be proud of what you currently are. Being sensitive is beautiful because our senses are present to whatever data presents itself to us. As much as we love to be asleep and zombified as most peeps are, we cannot. It's a blessing truly, to be awaken. So stand tall, proud to be you but humble enough to socialise with the world with love.
8.After the meetup is done, celebrate. Because you have done well. And don't forget to take showers or long bath (wudhu is also sufficient) to cleanse yourself of any entangling energies. And always imagine those you loved are always bless with good health, wealth and love.
Hope these helps.
Sending you much warm love, velvety hugs and chocolate kisses.