Day 12 – the art of being authentic, conscious and abundant woman series continues….

what I feel like saying… 

Sexual needs. 

As women, are we bold enough to ask for what we want? 

To know oneself is to know what we truly want and need, and be able to communicate those needs including our deepest desires. 

There is no shame in that. Everyone has them. 

I remembered when I was with my womanly tribe, we were openly sharing stuff about our lives. And they went on and on until it reached the topic-sex. 

I stood mum. Unable to express myself and so I silently listen. While they were complaining about the lack of it, I was shuffling in between my own dilemma. I have promised myself to abstain from sex for years. It’s my personal sabbatical journey with men. 

Yes, it can be due to my religious upbringing. Or perhaps my stubborn belief that sex is sacred. I just cannot allow any stranger to penetrate me just cos I’m feeling erm.. horny. 

Yes, of course I have my moments of weakness. Being a traveller, I have been seduced by the plethora of delicious men in my travels. 

Call me traditional, but I prefer my man fully baked after marriage. And knowing about energetic cords connecting us after sex and all that, it’s just too complicated and messy. 

But I applaud these women.

They showed me that we matter. Even the littlest things. And sex is not little thing. It’s big. It’s huge. It’s deep. We just tend to hide it cos some of us, were not taught to talk about it. 

We, women matter. And we should confidently ask for what we want and desire. Especially to our husbands, our soul mates, life companions and our intimate witnesses to our lives. 

Most men I talked to say that women who knows what they want and can communicate boldly in the bedroom, are sexy. They were not turned off, in fact, more…. turn on. And they love to do whatever it takes to make their women happy. 

If we are married but we are sexually deprived but too shy to communicate to our partners, then who’s fault is that? Your own.

Sex deprived women are hungry. And you cannot hide that hunger. It will only grow. 

I’ve facilitate healing for women who like me, has not had sex for a very long time. And if we are unable to express and release that, our vibes tend to be very “needy”. And we attract the wrong kind of men in our daily lives.

Go. Create intimate sacred conversations like sex with your hubby. Tell him, how, the method, the ways to experiment making love together, what pleasures you, what turns you on, what makes you in ecstacy and many more. (If you are shy, take baby step, to share just small intimacy details daily. Keep on going till the confidence grows. This can go both ways-for men as well) 

Be bold. Express your desires clearly and confidently. Practise voicing out. 

Rediscover yourself. Find out what you truly desire in an intimate relationship. 

Or if you are single like me, then there are many ways we can learn to express, release and satisfy our sexual desires, single-handedly (not necessary masturbation) . 

But of course, what happens in the bedroom, stays in the bedroom.

Be open to learn/unlearn. Listen within. Unleash that voice. 

Love, Lina.